Yesterday, I met a guy that was proud to tell me he was from Trinidad. I usually relate to guys better than girls, but there are some guys that you cant have a normal conversation with........
I noticed that this guy was really wanting me to think he was great. yuck.
I was stuck sitting beside him for 8 hours. It was pure torture to politely laugh at his not-so-funny humor, smile everytime he looked at me (which was a lot), and to pretend to be interested in what he was saying.
I really wanted to roll my eyes, tell him to get a life, MOVE ACROSS THE ROOM.
Today, I knew I would be in an even smaller space with this man. I positioned myself where NOBODY could sit by me. One look at me should say "I dont like to be near people" but in a nice, professional way....of course!
Trinidad walked into the room and rearranged tables and chairs to sit right next to me......great...
"Im from Trinidad, remember me?"
"I remember.".....crap, here comes my polite smile....not going to make it the next 4 hours, Im burning up, have a headache and feel the need to spew my opinion of this guy to his face.
He touches my wedding ring "hey, you werent wearing a wedding ring yesterday."
I restrain myself from punching him. "I know, I don't always wear it."
"I was going to ask you to come to Trinindad with me."
"hmmm, I don't think so."
"what? We would have fu..un..." (sing song voice)
"Isn't it in the tropics?"
"YES! It is beautiful!"
"yea, that doesn't sound appealing to me."
"You would love it!"
"I really don't think my husband and I would like it. We like cooler weather."
"I wasn't inviting your husband."
At this point, several of his female coworkers start laughing.
"Trinidad, we told you she was married!"
They turn to me. "Don't listen to him, he is crazy!"
I had been playfully harassing some other people in the class, so I used my humor to steer the conversation in a different direction AND I moved further back into the corner.
At this point I was sitting under the heat and began to burn from the inside out. After about an hour of feeling like I was in an oven, I ripped off my fleece pull-over.
Trinidad turned around and smiled. I wanted to pull my turtle neck over my head and disappear, but instead I said,
"If you don't pay attention, you are going to have to write a 500 word essay to get your certification instead of the quiz."
This just made him grin more.....and add a wink.
I am driving myself (and others) crazy with texting. If I am not saying inappropriate or outlandish things due to auto-correct, then I am sending texts to wrong people. I SWEAR when I look at the name it is correct, but when I push send...somehow I have texted to the wrong person. This has caused some unfortunate information getting to the wrong people. I am having to erase all my texting threads several times a day.
AM I THE ONLY ONE WITH TEXTING DISABILITY?
I'm not sure if the problem is the tongue or the brain....or both together!
Once I finally decide to let loose and talk to someone, I say the worst thing possible for that individual person:
"well, I mean, there really isn't a good politician. if you are in politics, there is something shady about you."
"My dad is a politician."
(of course he is...)
blah blah blah".....it is funny because he is so crazy! off his meds!"
"I have been diagnosed with blah blah"
(of course you have....)
"She is really odd.....you know, like one of those that treats her dog like it is her baby!"
I go into the next room and there are 27 professionally taken pictures of this person's dog dressed up like a dang child!
Please just let MAZ stay away from ANY conversation!